I have finally, after a year and a couple of months, written the first draft of a letter of things I want to say to my father. I've been spurred on by the site: The Things You Would Have Said and will probably post my letter once it is more succinct. (First drafts are always such train wrecks, eh?!)
Inasmuch as he was an emotionally injured kid (his dad died when he was 10) and teen (abusive stepfather) and adult (um, I think that is just him), he's about 80 now, give or take a year, and it might be time I stop letting him behave in selfish ways that still bring me to my knees.
Not sure what sending it to him will do for me, except get me further into the muck than out of it, so for now it will be one of those "Things I would have said" kinds of things. I'll post if/when it is published.